Post Haiti

 

One Week Ago I was on a plane heading from Port Au Prince, Haiti to Ft. Larderdale, Florida. Although not feeling 100% I wasn't ready to leave, at all. I wanted to stay I wanted to do more! I know at least two others felt this way while a few other couldn't wait to be back home for various reasons.

I feel like I could talk about my time in Haiti for hours, although I do find it hard to talk to most of my friends and family about it. Something is just missing when I talk to them about it. I feel almost as if they don't fully understand. (But they do all seem to listen)

This past week I've had such a hard time focusing on just about anything I try to concentrate on, especially during classes. My mind has been on Haiti, and my Heart has been is in Haiti. I've been brainstorming on additional ways to help the community, and BLB. I've been talking with my family about going back for Christmas. (I'm just honoring my dad's wish of waiting a month before I commit) I've been thinking about ways to fundraiser for additional trip. I've even began talking to friends who I KNOW would love Haiti and working on a time when we could possibly go together as a Britsionary group. 

In addition to Haiti I miss my people from my group!

Most would agree that I am typically passionate about almost everything I do. So I understand where people like my dad are coming from when he said wait a month and see if the feeling is still this strong before you give yourself for Christmas. I completely understand where he is coming from. I'm passionate about everywhere that I volunteer for. I love the shelters in Thailand, and I have said that I do want to go back. That is still true, however I have never seen myself making a life out of living in Thailand forever, maybe a month, but not forever. Purrs N' Pup-  I do still see myself with them forever, regardless of how distant I've been forced to become over the past year, PNP will always be my Rescue. Even if  move away and can't foster for them, PNP is still my rescue, and where I grew up, It's a group I'll always promote and help when I can. 

And now Haiti and Be Like Brit. Although this, this time I feel different. Not it a bad way, but in a better way. I've always struggled with a sense of who I am and what makes me different than my sisters. What makes me stand out. And most of all finding where I'll get what I want in my life. Haiti, man, Haiti showed me all of this in ways I can't describe. In ways that I don't even think I fully understand. I feel different about my trip to Haiti and volunteering with Be Like Brit. I loved it more than words can describe, and it feels so different to me than anywhere or anything else. Strangely I felt HOME, not "at home" but HOME. In a land that I had never been, with a language that I knew 3 phases in, with people who I had never met before, acting in situations I had never been put in before, witnessing things that one would never imagine, helping those who I never even saw or heard about before beginning to build, truly laughing with people I don't speak the same language, crying with those I had seen but never had a full conversation with before Haiti, and loving and being loved by those I just met. Haiti is a place where I never thought to feel at home. A place where I never thought I'd leave my entire heart in, a place where there is so much hope, love and laughter regardless of what little they have or will ever have. 

Since the Earthquake in 2010 I have wanted to volunteer in Haiti but never found the right opportunity. I am beyond grateful for the opportunity to have gone last week. I'm upset it took so long for me to get there, but I'm beyond excited I had it. I want to go back, I want to WORK, AID, and make Haiti a part of me everyday. I'm not quite sure how or where to stat, but I truly wish to make it happen. I will however take Jonathan's advise and experience working in Orphanages in other places as well, but I really believe Haiti will always be number one.  

"I Think I left my heart In Haiti.....

.........All that I think about is what I would be doing If i were still there, I can't stop thinking about Haiti. I have finally been able to do what I've wanted for nearly 4 years now, and I have loved every second of it and I want to get back as soon as I can!"

This past week I spent my time Volunteering as a Britsionary at the Be Like Brit Orphanage in Haiti. 

"The Orphanage was built in loving memory of Britney Gengel, who perished in the 2010 Haiti earthquake while on a service trip through her college, Lynn University. Be Like Brit honors Britney’s memory and legacy of compassion to those less fortunate, and was inspired by a text message she sent to her mother just 3 hours before the quake claimed her life.'They love us so much and everyone is so happy. They love what they have and they work so hard to get nowhere, yet they are all so appreciative. I want to move here and start an orphanage myself.'" (Taken Directly from the home page of BLB)

During my time at Be Like Brit I learned so much about Haiti, along with about myself. I experienced joy, love, compassion, guilt, hope, and faith. 

  I never thought I could fall in love with a place, a country, people so true, hard and as fast as I did. Each day of my time in Haiti I fell just more in love with it all. 

  I fell for the children first and foremost. Not only the ones with in the walls of BLB, but also with the ones outside of the walls of BLB. I love them, each and every one of them. Originally I thought the Language barrier would prevent us from communicating. I also didn't think the kids would really attack us with love when we walked into BLB. But Boy was I completely WRONG!

They LOVED my watch

 We were greeted by children singing for us and the second they finished singing, we all had a child in our arms, on our back, and by our sides. It was one of the best feelings. I had ever had until that point. The feeling of complete trust, and Love. 

 Each day I would meet a new kid who would stick with me every time we were doing activities that day. I also had children who every time they saw me RAN towards me and stuck with me. Both the children in the community and at BLB had lots of love to offer. Where ever you went rather you had a peewilly to offer them or not they wanted you. A high-5, a hug, a piggy-back ride, to be picked up, to be played with, to sit with you, to teach you their language and to be a kid. Rather we were working at a site, at church, the market, on a hike, at the beach, or just about anywhere, I met a child. One thing each Haitian child I met seemed to have in common was hope, faith, and love in their eyes. I heard their faith in song, experienced their love, and saw their hope. I feel in love with the children. I truly did. And I miss them, all of them, the older ones, the younger ones and the ones in between. I saw what Brittany saw- they were all grateful and proud of what little they had they LOVED us. 

  

Second I fell in love with adults. The mothers, the fathers, aunts, uncles, grandmothers. and cousins of the children I met. Each place I went I met someone new. Neither of us spoke the same language, but both of us were on the same page. We did our best to communicate. We used sign language and out fingers to point out and act out what we were trying to say. We taught each other the words for what we were trying to say. They helped us help them. One women on our second day in Haiti saw that I was too short to reach the top of a window to paint it. She saw me leaning to reach it from a tree stump. Then she brought over 2 cinder blocks for me to stand on so I could finish painting someone's house in her community. Someone who she didn't even know. She then stood by me holding the paint bucket up, and scratching the dried paint off my leg until the window was done. She was not only was helping the "Blan" (us) but she was helping someone in her community that she didn't even know. This didn't only happen while painting the house but also when we where building a house for one of the Caregivers for BLB.  I also got to know and love some of the caregivers who taught me as I taught them. I also saw within the community the strength in the people. They have nothing compared to what I have. Many times they go to sleep in fear for safety, with an empty stomach, in pain, sick, and so much more, but they don't complain. They pray, the hope, the have faith, and most of all they give what little they have and they are proud.

The nature- I feel in love with the landscape. The mountains, the ocean, the flowers. Yes, it is the poorest country in the western hemisphere, but that doesn't mean that it doesn't have natural beauty.  The water, why it was beautiful, and warm! I wish we were allowed and had time to swim. The mountings-they allowed me to see everything. I felt like I was on top of the world. It was amazing! I loved standing on top of Brittany's orphanage and looking past everything into the ocean. Its such a serene view, and it looks past all of the poverty and pain. I loved the view of the beach!  And the flowers- I usually don't care to much for them but I loved them! They where beautiful! However the Sunrise was the prettiest that I've EVER seen. nothing like I've really seen anywhere else. And the sunset were pretty high up there too.

Lastly a big part of what I feel in love with was Be Like Brit and the people who make it run. Kristin especially played a large role in this for us, as she is the one who organizes all of the Britisionary groups. She did an amazing job teaching us about the culture and preparing us for what we would see and what we would be doing. I had a lot of fun getting to know her and spend time with her and learning just some of what she does at BLB. I'm so thrilled to have been able to also meet & spend time with Len and Cherylann, Gama, Franky, Jonathan, Cupidon, Peterson,  Joe-Bear (I know I may have that completely spelt wrong--- Sorry), and everyone else who makes Be Like Brit amazing. I really love you and all you do! I can't WAIT to come back! I would love to do intern work with you somehow! I have my fingers crossed to be back for Christmas week!

In addition, I am so grateful for the other Britsionarys that I got to meet. You guys are amazing and I already miss you!! Tom and Christina- you guys are the best and I really hope we meet again. And Everyone from Becker- I'm super glad to have had the opportunity to create friendships with you! We have a bond of poop sharing and fart sharing, thanks to Kristin! We have to all hangout sometime and have a reunion- I mean 4 of you are nursing students with "no lives" and one of you are taking applications for friends, so I think we should make it happen!! and BEFORE you Seniors Graduate!!! Love you guys!!!! 

Be the Change

BE the Change.....

What does that mean to you? Why? What are you changing? How? Is it big? Small? 

Well, to be quite honest, after 7 months of attending Becker I'm still quite positive of what it means to me. 

What counts as BEING the change? What am I changing? 

What change will I make that will set me apart from everyone else to be different, to be the change?

I think my first step in this "change" is to find out who I am. 

 This past year I have really explored this subject through my travels and work. Working with children at the preschool taugh me about how much I love working with kids-especially the little ones. Being in and out of the hospital so many times taught me that I may even be able to see myself working in a pediatric unit one day. My trip to Thailand reminded me of how much I truly do love rescue and the medical work of it. College taught me that I love to be independent, and that I can really be outgoing.  Australia tested me on a bunch of these things and also taught me that I absolutely LOVE  backpacking. 

  All in one year I've learned this. And that year still isn't over! Crazy eh? I'm excited to see what Haiti has in store for me. To see. What "change" i'm going to make. Or more so The Change Haiti is going to make in me!

On The Way to The Airport

Well, I can't believe I'm headed to the airport again for another life changing trip. I can't share too many details yet, but I'll be sure to write post while I'm gone and post them when I have wifi again.
Before I hop on yet another plane, I want to take a minute to say a few words:
First thank you to my parents for all your support. Maybe you couldn't help me in all the ways you wanted over the past year, but just your positive attitude, and emotional support is more than enough.
Thanks to my sisters for challenging me in so many ways, and with all your what if's and "you can't's" Those are honestly they are some of what pushed me into biting into the world.
Thanks to both Jane and Addam for talking me into really wanting to go to Thailand. You guys are a huge part in what has made me want to keep traveling. (When I get back I plan on going to Boston, we'll have to meet up)
Thanks to Jersey Aussie, you are one of my biggest role models and mentors. I love your travel stories and they always make me wanna create my own. Thanks for also always giving me advise when I need it along with the truth.
Thanks to Molly, even though you can't read I love you so much and I miss you Every day.
Thanks to Heather Varley for your generous donation for my trip! I can't WAIT to tell you all about it!! And to Dr. Gluckman for getting me medically prepared!
Thanks to all my friends and families at home! Over the last year you guys have truly shown an overwhelming amount of love and support to me and I couldn't be happier to have each and everyone of you in my life. Because of you guys, you've allowed me to take an amazing trip in July, where I learned part of who I really am and who I want to be. Thank you!
And Lastly to my friends at Becker, thank you for ALWAYS being there for me when I need you! You guys are each Absolutely amazing in your own ways. Without you guys I'd have no social life and would hate every second of college. But because of you, it's the complete opposite!

Thank you heaps for all everyone has ever done for me!!! Love you all!!

(P.S. It's 2:30am- don't judge my grammar/spelling, it's also being typed on my phone, I'll edit when I get back-I just think that it is important I write this before I leave!)